Teachers Be Prepared.

From: The International Education Standards Board

To: School Districts, Teachers, Educational Facilities, etc.

At its most recent biannual meeting the IESB made a decision to revise the accepted alphabetical standard, concluding that the old one was in need of updating. The new standard will be as follows:


While we acknowledge this change may be controversial some concessions have been made to the previously accepted standard. Committee members however agreed that this is a more logical order and should be adopted immediately.

In pursuit of greater uniformity it was also agreed that in all countries where the final letter¬†is pronounced “zed” this practice may continue, but the eight proceeding letters will now be known¬† as bed, ced, ded, ed, ged, ped, ted, and ved.

The term “alphabet” also is no longer applicable and will be gradually phased out in favor of the new term “ajkafilm.”

Because of metrical changes the old standard “Next time won’t you sing with me” song no longer works, but the IESB hopes to have a new song available for teachers in time for them to learn it before the start of the next school term. To this end we have hired Philip Glass.

Thank you for your cooperation. Please begin ajkafilmizing your materials accordingly.



Facebook Comments


  1. pinknoam

    As an IT professional, I would like details on where to find the new proposed keyboard layouts to go along with the new ajkafilm.

    Also, does this mean that my C: drive is now going to be my ced drive?

    1. Christopher Waldrop (Post author)

      Hopefully keyboards won’t change. I’ve spent too much of my life learning how to touch-type on a QWERTY keyboard. Spare me one of those DVORAK types.
      And, yes, your C: drive is now your ced drive.

  2. Ann

    Personally, I’m all for this, because my initials are AJK.

    1. Christopher Waldrop (Post author)

      How fortuitous. You’re already on your way to being ajkafilmized.

  3. Jay

    Ah jeez. And I was just getting comfortable with the old one!

    1. Christopher Waldrop (Post author)

      That’s the way these things go. As soon as you get comfortable with something there’s a revision. Or an “upgrade”.


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