If the holiday season puts you in the mood for food why not order from the secret menu? These specialty items aren’t listed on the regular menus and ordering them at your local fast food joint is a great way to make that high school kid who just started two hours ago want to quit. See if you can pair up these spécialités with their maison.
- The Meat Mountain
Two chicken tenders, slices of roast turkey, pit-smoked ham, corned beef, 13-hour smoked brisket, USDA-choice Angus steak, roast beef, pepper bacon, with cheddar and swiss cheese
- Cinnamon Roll Frappuccino
- The Suicide Burger
A burger with four beef patties and four slices of cheese with bacon and “special savory sauce” that can be ordered with a side of Frings (half French fries, half onion rings)
- Microwavable chicken fried rice with an expiration date of 08/03/1998
- Land, Sea & Air Burger
Two hamburger patties, a fish filet, and a chicken patty on three buns. There’s also a landlubber version with two chicken patties.
- Frozen hot chocolate
- A cardboard box of Neapolitan ice cream with the chocolate missing
A quesadilla filled with about half the contents of a burrito
- Purple Sprite
Sprite mixed with Powerade, lemonade, and cranberry juice.
- The Meat Cube
A full pound of square hamburger patties.
- Dairy Queen
- Your office holiday pot luck lunch
- Burger King
- The freezer in your parents’ basement