Please Dream Responsibly.

“Molson Coors Beverage Company announced an ad they’re calling the ‘Coors Big Game Dream’ that uses something called ‘Targeted Dream Incubation’ to play commercials in your dreams (assuming you get some). Under the consultation of psychologist Dr. Deirdre Barrett, the beer conglomerate designed a combination ‘stimulus film’ and eight-hour soundscape that aims to ‘shape and compel your subconscious’ into dreaming about two signature drinks.”

–The Daily Beast

 

 

To: All Clients

Subject: Increased Advertising Opportunities

Good morning everyone,

As you are aware one of the impediments our industry faces is that, in spite of the increasing use of product placements in media, utilizing every available space, and efforts to turn every single person who’s ever lived as well as some animals into influencers, there are times when consumers simply don’t think about the products we’re trying to sell them. In an effort to proactively seize previously missed opportunities we are looking for ways to monetize the approximately seven to nine hours a day when most consumers are asleep. The technique of “Targeted Dream Incubation” is key to this new endeavor.

While this technique has been tried before technological limitations made it too intrusive. Our previous methods included calling people in the middle of the night and playing commercials. We also tried sending trucks equipped with megaphones through neighborhoods at night blaring messages about various products in an attempt to infiltrate the dreams of sleeping residents. We also tried paying aspiring actors to stand outside darkened homes and yell through the windows. Both of these methods resulted in some unfortunate incidents and litigation which is still pending, as well as generally negative reactions from consumers.

Now smart speakers and similar devices mean we can offer such advertising more unobtrusively, even without consumers even knowing it. To this end we’re looking at several options:

Since our first endeavor was for alcoholic beverages we’re looking at ways to preface the experience with “You must be 21 or older to enter this dream” in the United States, adjusting the number to 18 for Canada, Britain, and Australia, and to “You must be able to walk” for various parts of Europe.

Potential crossover opportunities. Our research has found that not all dream experiences are positive and we’re looking at ways to exploit this. We’ve had several pitch meetings to discuss the idea of reviving the character of Freddy Krueger from the popular ‘80’s film franchise. He remains popular in the nightmares of Gen X consumers and many have passed this on to their children. Maybe we could also reboot the 1984 film Dreamscape.

Regarding that same demographic we’ve tried, so far unsuccessfully, to enlist the band R.E.M. but remain optimistic they’ll come around.

We hope you’ll join us in what our former vice president of marketing Catherine called a “brave new world” shortly before she resigned and moved to an undisclosed off-grid cabin in Montana. Her last company e-mail included the question, “How do you sleep at night?” and we are grateful for this excellent suggestion for a marketing slogan.

Good night, everyone!

Source: Giphy

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6 Comments

  1. Arionis

    Funny! Now I have to worry about pop-up ads in my dreams? I remember going to see Dreamscape and thinking it was the coolest thing ever. A recent reviewing of the movie showed it did not hold up well.
    Arionis recently posted…Kindle Vella, I see what you did there Amazon!My Profile

    Reply
    1. Christopher Waldrop (Post author)

      Pop-up ads are the invention of a truly sick individual and if you see them in your dreams I hope you can smack them down immediately. And it’s been a long time since I watched Dreamscape but I’m not surprised it doesn’t hold up. Actually I don’t even remember it that well but I do vividly remember Siskel and Ebert practically getting into a fistfight over it. That was pretty funny.

      Reply
  2. M.L. James

    OMG! That’s hysterical…as long as it’s not real! If they could, you know they would. Also, one more reason not to have “smart” technology. Manipulative, devious and insidious, is what that is. I’m one of those people who if I feel too manipulated, I will stop using the product ever again. Just as…oh who were those people…Proctor & Gamble? I think that’s who it was. Don’t remember why, now. Just know I won’t use them. #notsorry Mona

    Reply
    1. Christopher Waldrop (Post author)

      I hate to tell you this but “targeted dream incubation” is real and is something advertisers have tried to use, although with mixed results and I don’t think they’re really pursuing it because it’s not that effective and because of the possible backlash over people feeling their dreams are being invaded with commercials.

      Reply
  3. ANN J KOPLOW

    I loved the movie “Dreamscape” and I love your blog, Chris. Keep dreaming with us.

    Reply
    1. Christopher Waldrop (Post author)

      Now I think I should revisit Dreamscape and I love that you’ve put that thought in my head.

      Reply

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