Christopher Allen Waldrop was born several years ago and has lived somewhere ever since. He is a Sagittarius, but don’t hold that against him. He’s been from Indiana to Russia and back. He speaks just enough of half a dozen languages to be unable to communicate with anyone. He picks up spiders with his bare hands but is terrified of ferrets. When the mood strikes him he files assault charges. If he didn’t run out of quarters he wouldn’t stop playing pinball. He doesn’t know what the deal is with pudding and wishes you would quit asking. He really loves his wife and is happy to be owned by multiple Dalmatians. In his spare time he breeds urinals. His friends kindly ask that you please not get him started.