Polite Quiz.
This quiz will test your knowledge of etiquette. If you encounter ambiguous or confusing questions consult the answer key before proceeding.
1) You’re walking with a friend down the street. You should
a) Walk on their left
b) Walk on their right
c) Decide based on whether they’re left or right-handed
d) Pretend to push them into traffic and laugh
2) A co-worker shares confidential information about a fellow co-worker with you. You should
a) Say nothing
b) Report the co-worker who spoke to you to HR
c) Report both co-workers to HR
d) Use the information to blackmail Kevin into bringing you duty-free Scotch from the conference he’s attending
3) You’re running late for a meeting and step into the elevator. You see another person approaching from a distance. You should
a) Hold the door
b) Let them get the next elevator
c) Pretend you don’t see them
d) Yell “Hurry!” while you’re pressing the ‘Door close’ button
4) You’re tweeting a Periscope video that was shared from an Instagram link on Facebook. Should you also like it on Tumblr for your Tindr profile?
a) Yes
b) No
c) Only if the person who sent it has added you to their LinkedIn network
d) Get off my lawn!
5) You’re spending the night at Lord Buldlington’s manor. Whilst dressing for afternoon tea you discover your third valet forgot to pack an extra set of garters. You should
a) Send word to the sophomore footman that you require supplemental livery
b) Ask the underbutler to create a distraction in the parlor so your manservant can slip into Sir Merton’s room and “borrow” his walrus-ivory cufflinks
c) Feign illness and have a cold supper of smoked tongue and aspic in your room
d) Create a scandal by calling Lady Bertrille “a swotty knickerbocker”
6) You’re having drinks with coworkers. The person to your left has purchased a round for the entire table. Everyone expects you to do the same but you don’t have enough money. You should
a) Apologize and offer to pay for the drink the other person purchased
b) Buy drinks but quietly ask a friend to help
c) Decide you can be a little late with this month’s rent
d) Buy several more rounds and appetizers and wake up three days later in a Vegas hotel room with an armadillo and the word “ANTHROPOMORPHIZE” tattooed on your forehead
7) You make a bank shot off two rails and sink one of your opponent’s balls. You believe this is a foul and the ball should be replaced. Your opponent disagrees. According to the rules
a) You are correct
b) Your opponent is correct
c) The ball doesn’t count but should remain pocketed
d) It’s time for another round of drinks
8) You are driving down a narrow road and the driver behind you insists on tailgating. You should
a) Maintain your current speed
b) Slow down
c) Tap your brakes
d) You’re driving in Russia, so who cares? Go offroad!
9) You’re at an elegant dinner party and a dish you don’t recognize is served. You look at the array of utensils next to your plate. You should
a) See what the people on either side of you pick up
b) Use the shrimp fork
c) Use the oyster knife
d) Get a new plate each time you return to the buffet
10) You and a friend have made plans to go out. At the last minute your friend cancels but you learn later that your friend was seen out without you. You should
a) Say nothing and assume your friend had good reasons
b) Say nothing and save it for a later argument
c) Ask your friend what happened
d) Disguise yourself and start stalking them
11) You receive an email and forget to reply to it. After a week the sender sends a follow-up email asking if you received the first email. You should
a) Apologize and reply immediately.
b) Claim the email went to your junk folder
c) See if they’ll send a third email
d) Cut off all internet access, move to Borneo, and adopt a whole new identity
12) You’re about to drop your calling card at the Windermere House and you notice both Henry Greene and Aloysius Wells have left their cards first. You should
a) Leave your card on top even though this will reveal you were late
b) Slip your card to the bottom
c) Split and double down
d) Take Greene’s card and inscribe the word “Scallywag” on it
13) You’re at a party and are introduced to a large number of strangers. To remember their names you should
a) Mentally repeat each person’s name to imprint it on your memory
b) Repeat each person’s name once as you’re introduced to them
c) Suggest that everyone wear nametags
d) Just call everyone “Jeff”
14) A person to whom you’ve just been introduced asks how much money you make. You should
a) Say you don’t discuss personal finances
b) Ask, “Why, do you need to borrow some?”
c) Say, “Obviously more than you based on those shoes.”
d) Set them on fire.
15) You’re taking an online quiz and start to doubt your answers. You should:
a) Keep going. You’re doing your best and that’s all you can do
b) Quit because who really needs this crap?
c) Take “Potent Potables” for $600
d) Check the answer key