Now that you’ve published a lightning bug/firefly post I guess I’ll have to tell you about the mass murder that my wife perpetrated that I mentioned in a previous comment.
My wife is from Canada and they don’t have a lot of bugs up there so she had never seen a lightning bug up close. In this case I was out of town and she was going to BBQ. When she opened up the grill she found a nest of what she called roaches. She immediately grabbed a can of insect spray and thoroughly coated every last one of them. They came running out of the grill but died horrible deaths on the deck just seconds later. Creeped out by the “roaches”, she abandoned her grilling plans and went and called an exterminator because she was convinced our whole place was infested with roaches. The exterminator couldn’t come over until the next day, so later on that night, when it got dark, my wife noticed some feeble glows coming from some of the carcasses of the vanquished roaches. She didn’t quite understand what was going on until the exterminator showed up the next day and informed her she had murdered hundreds of poor little fire flies. To this day I never let her forget that when I see the first one of the season.
That’s horrible and hilarious at the same time. Its horrarious. Or hillarible. And here I thought it was crazy that the first time my friend from England saw fireflies he thought he was hallucinating. Maybe it’s a good thing none of the fireflies your wife took down tried to fly away. That would have really freaked her out.
I so needed to laugh. Thank you!
Thank you–I’m so glad I could light up your day.
Haha! That’s hilarious!
Now that you’ve published a lightning bug/firefly post I guess I’ll have to tell you about the mass murder that my wife perpetrated that I mentioned in a previous comment.
My wife is from Canada and they don’t have a lot of bugs up there so she had never seen a lightning bug up close. In this case I was out of town and she was going to BBQ. When she opened up the grill she found a nest of what she called roaches. She immediately grabbed a can of insect spray and thoroughly coated every last one of them. They came running out of the grill but died horrible deaths on the deck just seconds later. Creeped out by the “roaches”, she abandoned her grilling plans and went and called an exterminator because she was convinced our whole place was infested with roaches. The exterminator couldn’t come over until the next day, so later on that night, when it got dark, my wife noticed some feeble glows coming from some of the carcasses of the vanquished roaches. She didn’t quite understand what was going on until the exterminator showed up the next day and informed her she had murdered hundreds of poor little fire flies. To this day I never let her forget that when I see the first one of the season.
That’s horrible and hilarious at the same time. Its horrarious. Or hillarible. And here I thought it was crazy that the first time my friend from England saw fireflies he thought he was hallucinating. Maybe it’s a good thing none of the fireflies your wife took down tried to fly away. That would have really freaked her out.
I like seeing them when I’m at the drive-in.
I always imagine they have some secret coded message for me.
This post is a little deflating, actually.
Now I feel a little guilty. Although you can still imagine they have a secret coded message for you. It’s just funnier than you ever realized.
I think you’re so smart, Chris, and I’m not talking out of my ass.
I know you’re very smart–and I’m speaking from my head–so I’m glad to know you think I’m smart too.